it's all about you ♥

i never believe them when they tell me i'm beautiful. so why do i believe you..

2011-03-12T17:40:00.001+08:00

You deserve more.

You deserve someone who loves you with every single beat of his heart, someone who thinks about you constantly, someone who spends every minute of every day just wondering what you're doing, where you are, who you're with and if you're okay.

You need someone who can help you reach your dreams and still protect you from your fears.

You need someone who will treat you with respect and love every part of you, especially your flaws.

You should be with someone who can make you happy, really happy, dancing-on-air happy.

So isabel t** h** x***, i can be that someone. If you just give me a chance. :)

sometimes the nicest things u say to someone are those you didnt have to think through. that also goes for the meanest.

2010-09-15T19:33:00.004+08:00

i think.. the sweetest thing that has ever been said to or about me, was heard that day when we were playing a game and didi just said:

'i wanna make isabel smile'.

those words went straight from my senses right into my heart .><.

you.

2010-09-15T19:26:00.004+08:00

i miss how you said 'it will be okay', when darkness was all i saw.

i miss your laugher that echoed through the room and made even the saddest smile.

i miss the feel of my hairband being pulled off, every morning when you greeted from behind.

i miss the way you let me win, even when you knew you'd lose more than just the game.

i miss how your whisper 'you okay?' always made me want to cry.

i miss how you tried and tried to make me smile, no matter how long it took.

i miss the times we'd stand alone at the end of the corridor, looking to the sky, watching birds fly and wind blow, not needing to say a word.

but most of all, i miss...

lost and found

2010-04-02T18:43:00.002+08:00

Sometimes, people can go missing right before your very eyes. Sometimes, people discover you, even though they've been looking at you the whole time. Sometimes, you lose sight of yourself when you're not paying enough attention.

We all get lost once in a while. Sometimes by choice, sometimes due to forces beyond our control. After we learn what our soul is meant to learn, the path presents itself. Sometimes we see the way out but wander further and deeper despite ourselves. The fear, the sadness, preventing us from returning. Sometimes we prefer to be lost and wandering, sometimes it's easier.

Sometimes we find our own way out. But sometimes we need the help of loved ones; or even strangers.

Regardless, we are always found.

2 people

2010-03-21T20:41:00.003+08:00

today, i figured out that different peoples' lives, no matter how alike they are, can be really really different.

i look around.

this guy's having the time of his life enjoying the happiness of just living. like he says: "there's no point being intelligent when you enjoy life too much."
while that guy, right at the other side of the room is beaten and down and just plain broken. his feeling: "brain and brawn are useless when the heart is broken."

both so true. both so different from the other.

thinking back, i remember how this now happy guy used to be so down. feeling unaccepted, unloved and left out. yet now, how things can change.

looking at 2 people from total opposites, i just feel happy to be content. not very happy but not too sad either. i'd rather be a little richer, i have to admit. haha.. but still, i think a lesson is learnt from them.

sometimes, life is just plain mean. it can throw anything at you and wait for you to fall.
sometimes, it's so unbearable that many do fall. but
sometimes, you just gotta trust God and move forward even when your whole heart and soul just wants to let it all go and give up.
sometimes, you just can't give up.

because in the end, you know way deep deep down in your heart, it will all be alright.

quote of the day

2010-02-02T19:50:00.001+08:00

a wise girl once said : "Guys that don't appreciate you is not worth your time. If they walk out on you, Just turn your back and continue your journey towards a better life. Never look back to shed a single tear for those jerks."

TO: JOYCE

2010-01-29T21:57:00.009+08:00

so sad cant go for ur surprise party T.T did u get surprised kaokao? XD
anyway....

SURPRISE!!!

HAPPIIE BIRTHDAY JOYCE MAH TEDDIE~~~~~!!! I'LL ALWAYS LOVE YA LOTS!!!! :3

LOVES, BEL ^^

FORM4

2010-01-29T21:42:00.002+08:00

hey... umm.. i think i forgot how to write here dy.. hehe.

uhh.. well.. form4 been super busy. i cant tahan the accounts teacher. SO BORING MAN the way she talks. -.- never changes her tone. NEVER. except when she scolds ppl. arghss..

too. many. homework. yesterday sivik teacher asked us to to a 'jadual waktu'. so i just write my normal jadual lor. and i just realised... MY LIFE IS SO BORING!!!!! just school, homework, practice piano, guitar, revision, tuition, sleep. repeating again and again and again and again. omg. i'm dying. ughhhh....

ma yah... i miss my old friends..... like my 'jie fu' said : " we already have our friends and gang. even though we're apart (is different classes), now want us to accept new friends is really really hard. my door is closed. "

sigh.
peace out.

thank you!!

2010-01-13T15:45:00.004+08:00

hey guys! i'll make this short n sweet cuz i got LOADS of homework waiting to be touched.

My aawwesome parents got me a new handphone for my 'awwesome' results! XD

so thank you!!!! ^^

oh and i found this heart shaped YAW CHAR GUAI while i was eating porridge at home! XD

cry

2010-01-10T18:25:00.001+08:00

FORM 4 SUCKS RIGHT NOW. SOB...! ....>.<....

Christmas partie!

2009-12-29T21:26:00.008+08:00

on 25th decenber.. aka Christmas day.. we had a christmas-birthday party with my aunt's family and my kai ma n her hubby. ^^

glorious glorious food~~

birthday cake~

mah presents! XD mostly from mah loverly church youths and cousins.. actually all from them. haha..
thanks to johnny and josean

thanks to joyce, xin n peiyee

thanks to laiyee, ker yong, samantha, kevin n psc

thanks to elene, laiyee, pope, crystal n lydia

thanks to the choong bros, xin wei, jessie n crystal

thanks to aunty loo, sarah, kelvin n kai ma

thanks to jia wern n zhi yee

loves to all~!! ^^ muackxes!

winter solstice...

2009-12-29T21:14:00.003+08:00

winter solstice was on 22nd december. so me and mah family had our annual 'tang yuan' making night on 21st.

looky at that pics >>

i'm missing cuz i'm ze photographer. haha

PMR results~

2009-12-24T19:10:00.004+08:00

ahh.. life's not that bad afterall...

got my pmr results today. went to skul with dad at 11am eventhough it's supposed to be at 10am cuz my friends told me they weren't ready. hahas..

the head said a few words, read out the statistics, a datuk said a few words, and they announced the names and gave out flowers to all the straight A students 1 by 1. all that made me pretty impatient. lolz..

so anyway, after all that, we went to the table n my dad squeezed through the ppl to take my results while i waited out of the crowd. apparently he was more impatient than me. haha. we managed to be 1 of the first ppl to get the result slip.
when i read it, my heart almost popped! i got...*xixixi*...7As.. ^^ and 1C for chinese. hahaha... nevertheless, i was jumping around for joy xD

yayayayay~ so, very happie now~

wanna thank u guys...

THANK YOU FAMILY, FOR ALL THE PRAYERS AND GUIDANCE.
THANK YOU FRIENDS, FOR ALL THE PRAYERS AND ENCOURAGEMENT.
THANK YOU CHURCH YOUTH & MEMBERS FOR ALL THE PRAYERS.

lastly,

THANK YOU GOD FOR LISTENING AND ANSWERING ALL OUR PRAYERS. XD

yeah, so that's it people. time to focus on form4. aiks.
peace out dudes!

pure happiness

2009-12-19T15:07:00.005+08:00

19th december~

2009-12-19T12:49:00.006+08:00

happie birthdae to mee~ happie birthdae to mee~ happie biiirthdaeee to mee-ee~ happie birthdae to meee~!! xD

i know most of u might nvr get to see my house...so take a look at my beoootifulley decorated house! ^^ haha...

please christmas dont be late~~~

beootiful tree >

beootiful house

(my doggie at the window! xD) >

christmas + new year decor! >

~the end~ ^^

the sweeter the memory, the more the hurt..

2009-12-16T20:44:00.004+08:00

in penang queensbay mall~ baskin robins~

aiyo darn small cuz all taken by phone..

course dinner...

2009-12-16T20:32:00.005+08:00

in penang dinner~

Mr. LEO ah kau xD

drink wine~

drunk! haha....

haha..

uh oh..

lost someone...

2009-12-16T19:28:00.006+08:00

7/12 - 10/12 went to youth camp in broga.. had lotsa fun there with the awesome youth :P tired now so i wont talk alot bout camp. will let the pics do the talking :]

10/12 - 12/12 APYAC 09! went with crys, lyd, joyce, chelle, josh, isaac, david, jienyue n pssc.. me, crys, lyd, chelle, josh, isaac n pssc stayed in church. we had an awesome time with the guys n i found out josh is actually suuuuuuper talkative. whole view of him changed liao. haha... the conference was totally amazing. ps mike pilavachi is THE BEST pastor ever. definitely too awesome for words. ahaha.. cant wait to get the vcds from josh n rewatch the whole conference xDD

12/12 - 15/12 travelled back to penang. had a great time with my cousins goin christmas shopping, watching tv, playing or just eating meals. awesome.... hahas...

notice my days are always overlaping? o.O lolz...

youth camp~

i know you said that you'd be here anyway...

2009-11-27T17:59:00.006+08:00

hey... long time no see huh.. finally felt like saving my blog from dying.. lolz. but tak tau wat to say..

aiks. ok, les just crap.

past week was not bad..as in not boring (excluding today). went to see the camp site for youth camp this year last friday. no comment bout that.. u guys can see for yourself if u go. hehe. was supposed to watch jennifer's body with crys they all aft that but came back too late. so went for 2012 with joyce and david. damn nice the show...to me la. :] kekeke

then.. saturday went to mum's collegue's sister's wedding lunch. me n my parents were the only chinese (again) among a 100+ malays. lolz.. was a nice lunch though, at a place i've never heard of called crystal crown hotel..

sunday was pretty normal. well, there was a difference in church but i dont really know how to describe it. hmm. hahas..

monday n tues, nothin special i guess except my piano teacher couldnt come on monday and i was super happy. haha.

then wednesday had an informal practice for youth camp.. haha.. bout 11 of us from mornin til evening. since then i cant stop playin ma guitar and singing and joyce cant stop singing. hahass...

oh oh oh! yesterday had a great time with da camp committee... we went out to buy stuff for the camp in the morning. joyce and dan are super funny people to be with. haha... went back to church aft lunch to do other stuff and then i had to go back early cuz had tuition. haihs. tuition.

anywayyy... that's my week. maybe gonna watch new moon with lyd and crys n 'those' guys. haha.. kays. parents probly on the way home. i gotta chao. byes~

PS. i love you alpha cell peepsss.... muackx.

it ends now.

2009-11-10T13:31:00.007+08:00

hey all..

just reading and reading and reading these days...good way to fill boredness-es.haha.

books i've read recently >>

If You Could See Me Now

Where Rainbows End

The Host

currently reading >>

PS. I Love You

going to read >>

Season Of Secrets

Among The Hidden

Click: Ten Voices, One Story

The Heartbreakers: Love Rules

kays.. justa short post. gonna get backta my reading..

tata~

the host

2009-11-02T12:31:00.006+08:00

finished all 808 pages of my book called The Host! yaays~! it's a super good book.everyone should read it.hahas..

i'm super bored..

i'm really bored.

really really bored.

ho hums...see ya guys later~

-us in the window, me 2nd from right (youth camp 07)-

Tu Amor ~

2009-10-23T12:53:00.006+08:00

i'm suddenly hooked on the songs by ReBelDe (RBD) now.they're a mexican pop group and even though i dunno many of the words they sing, i love most of their songs. ^^

love Christian Chavez (the blonde one).so ok, he aint THAT handsome or hot, but he's got cute baby like dimples when he smiles and he sings well.he constantly re-dyes his hair red, purple, orange, pink and blonde.but so what? he's adventurous.haha..though i have to say blonde is the nicest.he's cute when they sing Tu Amor (My love). ^^

quotable quotes

2009-10-23T12:16:00.005+08:00

LOVE is canvas created by nature and embroidred by imagination.

the heart sees things that are invisible for the eye.it speaks a language we dont understand.

chase your dreams an do not forge who you are.be yourself and you will shine like a star.

time is like a bird on the wing.it comes and goes as it pleases.

if you want something you never had, do smething you never did.

GRAVITY AINT RESPONSIBLE FOR PEOPLE FALLING IN LOVE!

Flyday already???

2009-10-23T09:10:00.003+08:00

wait a minute.just wait a darn minute!

it cant be friday today.the week feels like it just started! didnt i go to cell yesterday?? oh man.how come i dont remember doing anything the whole week...

monday-holiday.stayed at home and slacked.

tuesday-holiday.stayed at home and slacked.

wednesday-school day.very fun day til got into trouble for ponteng-ing.

thursday-school day.stayed at home and had movie marathon with anna.

friday-today.school day.staying at home and slacking.

ahh...now i see..i've gone to school only once and havent done anything beneficial the whole week.no wonder it feels like it just started. >< aiks.i better get working with something before the whole hols slip through my fingers huh? ...

i know.i'll go experiment with all the baking recipes i got.haha.
i love baking~ ^^

best weekend in months

2009-10-19T20:28:00.003+08:00

welll.....since anna 'asked' me to (haha), i'll just say something bout our 8 person-ed trip to sunway lagoon on friday.

it was a super fun way to celebrate our finishing-of-pmr i gotta say.went there at about 11am and played at the scream park (and man, did we scream), dry park and wet park.it was fantastic overall.got all wet and hyped up and high.

went back to sunway pyramid at 6+pm to grab some dinner.yes, sorry i forgot i was supposed to fast..thats cuz MC my good 'jie fu' promisd to treat me to dinner after my complaints about going to lagoon cuz its 'soo expensive'. xP hahas..some of us ached everywhere for some reason (play too much) haha.

went straight to cell after finishing dinner and hang gai abit.reached at 9+pm (late) and had cell.duh.*slaps forehead* anyways, haha.'celebrated' bdays of youths in october, novembrrr and decemba which was me, tonton and jonathan.ate quite some supper there after singing bday song and all that.it was a fun way to end the day. :]

~

so, now yesterday.i mean..now i'll talk about yesterday.haha..went with the kids and other chaperones to bukit jalil park for children's day.went in jessie's car with pope and small isaac (he's so cute when he talks to himself.ahaha.) it was so hot there i almost melted.

my most vivid memory is carrying the box of unopened bottles of mineral water down the smal hill to put in the van.it was heavy.really heavy by the time i got down.a few times i almost dropped the whole box but pope took it from me a little way from the van. (i carry very long way dy okay!! dun call me qian jing!!) really admire jessie, man...she carried a box of 1litre bottles!! i only carried 500ml ones. *blush* haha. *bows to jess*

it was fun too though..the kids played games, fed fish and had lunch.they got gift packs and stuff to bring home.

after that we went back to church at 12pm.thats when isaac kept talking.to himself as pope and jess says.haha.so cute.

yeah it was a nice day.the only thing bad that came out of it was my hands.they were literally trembling whenever i stood up.now they ache like mad and i was still forced to have piano class a couple hours ago.ouchhh...

okay.thats about it.i'll post something when another fun day comes along huh?
ciao~

2009-10-17T22:10:00.001+08:00

the me you know was me 2 years ago.

gimme my 6As! i said give it!! XD

2009-10-13T17:00:00.005+08:00

is it over?

tell me its over...

it is?

really??

YES!!!!!!!!!

~

lets see.BM was ok (B), SCIENCE was hard in paper2 (A), ENGLISH easy of course (A), MATH piece o cake (A), GEO easy (A), SEJARAH not so easy (A), KH not bad (A), CHINESE hard (B).
my aims.HAHA..

Man, i am the happiest girl today.Ok, not THAT happy cuz tmr have piano class again.but still happy lar ^^
its cuz PMR is over of course.
even though i never counted on even getting 4As...i think if my calculations are not wrong i can actually get 6As! (for me thats big ok) haha..thats why i'm soo happy today~ wakaka...

So.i guess i'll be spending my days slacking at home or going to sunway (pyramid or church) or redbox or cinemas or genting or...just be plain lazy from now on.
gosh, i'm still in disbelief that i can actually do that now!!! XD

YAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYS~~~~~~!!!!! XDD

new leaf..?

2009-09-18T09:57:00.004+08:00

oh man.
with my constant daydreaming, spacing out n getting blur all the time, my guardian angel really has a full time job nowadays.
everyday i slip 3-4 times at least while in school, at home, going up or down the stairs or even when i'm just walking. >< but i NEVER fall.never.not once.so everyday i end up saying 'thank God' like more than 10 times all together.a few times for every almost-fall.haha.

i feel really peaceful these days..
like, even when i just finish my exam paper and know i got lots i dunno how to do, even when i remmber PMR is in a few weeks, i just shrug it off and truly forget about it. (no, no.dont worry.i still study.) not like usual times when i shrug it off but cant stop thinking about it and get all stressed up.

yeah, i feel..calm.
really relaxed in a way..
very at peace with the world.

which is the reason for my non-stop daydreaming.lolx.

for once in my life, i feel like everything is alright.

PMR O.O

2009-09-14T15:15:00.011+08:00

hiya....long time no post ler!!

vry busy with pmr now... its in a few weeks!!!! study study study........

oh.its 2nd trial now.hate examss!!!!

sometimes really feel like it! sometimes wanna poison it!

sometimes just wan to it!!

OH MY GOSH.ITS COMING! IT REALLY IS!!! GOD SAVE US!!!!

STUDIIEEEEE~~~~~~~!!

its never too late

2009-09-09T23:15:00.003+08:00

Gosh.where to start..

Just re-read my last post (deleted) and noticed how irrasional i was when i said all those things..it was unfair to my parents me saying all that without thinking thru it first.i just blabbed it all out.i dint even remember saying those things til i reread it.it was really harsh.and somewhat untrue. >< so,

Sorry daddy and mummy..
really truly sorry...

I cant change my ways overnight, noone can.but i know one day.one day, i'll become the mature lady you 2've always wanted.and you'll be impressed.
just like 'his' dad was with 'him'.yup, you can bet it.

So, yeah.forgive me ok..
nitenite.

trying to find a better part of me..

2009-09-07T16:23:00.001+08:00

love this pic...for some reason..so nice...

sorry lyd...i pun tak tau y u not here ><

2009-08-24T22:25:00.002+08:00

You've got a smile that seems to me
Reminds me of childhood memories..
Where everything
was as fresh as the bright blue sky.
And then when i see your face
It takes me away to that special place.
And if i stared too long
I'd probably break down and cry..

i believe...

2009-08-22T13:31:00.006+08:00

I used to think that I could not go on..

And life was nothing but an awful song..

But now I know the meaning of true love.

I'm leaning on the everlasting arms...

Listen to the song here in my heart.

A melody I start but can't complete..

Listen to the sound from deep within..

It's only beginning to find release...

I followed the voice you gave to me,

But now I've gotta find my own...

thanks for the memories

2009-08-19T15:14:00.008+08:00

hey peoples.remember me? please say yes! if u dont, dun bother reading this la..u dunno me anyway... -.-
...
xD just kidding la!! i know u sure remmber me wan right? =P
trials jus ended today and i'm so happie~ ^^

~

so anyway, to the main point of this post.these few days (weeks rather) have been so busy.but it got me thinking too..
what would life be without friends? true ones especially.friends u can always count on and share your ups and downs with.without 'em, i think i might be dead now (choi choi choi! haha.).but seriously, i'd want to die.

imagine going to school or church or anywhere else and have noone to say 'hi' to and talk abt how the weekend was, or wat interesting things we did yesterday, or places we went to.imagine going to the theater and laughing/crying at a show on your own.imagine having noone to share your problems with! (i know.there's still family.but sometimes they just dun understand, u know?)

look at all the possiblities...i'm horrified just thinking about it.

in my life, i've had many happy times, many fun times, many crazy times, many so-silly-happie-feel-like-i'm-walking-on-air times.but of course many many sad, hard times.

i'm sad to say, i never quite knew how to share my probs and stuff with my parents, eventhough they have always (almost always) been supportive, letting me know that i can always share things with them.sorry =[ so i turned to friends.lovely lovely friends.
now, i wanna thank all you guys who've been helping me or just 'been here with me' through all these times.even if now we dun talk anymore cuz of any reasons (not counting me not wanting to to talk to u, which is definitely not a reason), i really truly appreciate you guys for being here even just a short peroid of time.and i mean this with all my heart.

my girlfriends >

to crystal, who always has smiles to give and laughter to share.
to anna, who is always first in line to share her problems and hear mine.
to laiyee, who brightens days with her crazy ways.
to joyce, who can always be counted on.
to lydia, who is a silent care-r.
to debbie and cathy, who will forever be a wonderful part of the ACIDs.

my boy (space) friends >

to johnny, who will always be my first and bestest kor.
to rueben, who has been here and will always be here for me (but can still disappear anytime xD). (dun 想歪.seriously.dont.i mean it.)
to reuben, who eventho isnt always 'there', is a good kor and counselor all the same.
to stan, who lighted up my life that awesome period of time.
to david, who was and is a good and funny friend to cheer ppl up.

thank you for the memories that you have given me and are going to give me.each and every one of you.a beautiful memory of stars in my very own sky.

1.8.09!!

2009-08-07T14:13:00.004+08:00

1 august.big day~ me daddy's birthday!! celebrated daddy and bro's (10 august) birthdays with a great homecooked meal and cake we baked ourselves ^^

as laiyee jie would say, let da pics do the talkin xD haha.. >>

chicken chop with mashed potatoes and salad.deeeelicious!

group photo~~ =]

eating our dinner..hehe

me and my favourite birthday boys~

sis: 'hey!! that's the last of it leh!! >(' haha..

arent they handsome? haha...

donuts for dessert!!! yummm~

homebaked cake witha spinkles! xD

johnnykor's art (AWESOME)

2009-07-31T18:54:00.014+08:00

these are some of the many artwork done by johnny that are simply awesome.it took super long for me to decide which 1 to put first and last cuz they're sll so nice..so please have a good look at em...please click on them to enlarge them.please do.if u can.its much more fascinating when you can see all the details....please please please do.i sound desperate.i know.but wat to do? they're so goooooood!!!!! haha.enjoy!! [click on the post title to see johnny's full art gallery =P]

ZE-3 Saber (my total fav!)

Mercenary 1 (1 of my favs)

Mercenary 2 (1 of my favs)

JCI Unit 1 a.k.a. Hanzo (1 of my favs)

Hideyoshi's Samurai

Angelic Crusader 2 (1 of my favs)

Angelic Crusader 1

Acacia, giver of life (1 of my favs)

Viet the Uncontrollable (1 of my favs)

Corvus the Battlemage

Ciel (absolutely fascinating if enlarged)

Zero

Unit Alpha 1

Angelina Jolie

just noticed i got so many favs..hahah...nice right??? yeah!!! xD

in this moment now, capture it.remember it.(26.7.09)

2009-07-28T18:06:00.005+08:00

okay.in a real big hurry here.just wanna have a lil update about last sunday...

so..had breakfast at mcD (been a long time since i had mcd) with my family before goin to church.had a great service, then guitar class.guitar class was..abnormal yet normal.meaning, awkward.

aft church, went to sunway pyramid with sarah, brian, jian hui, johnston and crys.went to buy movie tickets to the new harry potter show when suddenly the pope called to say my bro was missing from guitar class.called up my mom n found out that bro went home dy. -.-'

anyway, aft buying the tickets went over to Popeye's to eat lunch (eventho i alrd thot we had lunch in the car with all the burgers and fries n drinks..but i guess not. *shrugs*) met the Ha family and michelle while eating..

later me n crys went into the cinema first aft buying popcorn n stuff.then the others came.with johnnykor too (he came from home.lolx.).

there was some prob with the show.at the beginning, it took really long to start.then when the movie trailers and advertisments started, it suddenly stopped and the lights came on.then aft a while it started again.this happened a few times.by the third time, everyone was grumbling dy.
johnnykor beside me even said that the first time he came here (this's only the 2nd time), the show had a prob n they had to refund them! O.O i was getting mad.finally, the real show started.it stopped again for just a minute, then continued to the end.thank god.

the show was quite ok....not as bad as i expected.lolzzz.it took from 330-630 all cuz of those malfunctions. -.- me n crys were freezing there.not many action scenes..but there was 1 part at the lake when it was sooo quiet, a hand came out of the water n grabbed harry's hand! every1 jumped up! haha...exept for kor.who laughed. o.O haha.

but still, overall we had a good time.wouldnt mind going again.haha... ^^

that's all..see ya in a week or so.....gotta study more.which means blog less. T.T bye~

a lesson well learnt

2009-07-17T17:23:00.005+08:00

I've learned...

If you hold on to the past, you forget the present and lose the future.

I've learned...

It don't matter what people think about me.It matters what i think about myself.

I've learned...

Boys were never meant to understand girls and girls were never made to understand boys.

i've learned...

There will always be someone there to give me a shoulder when i cry, a hand when i fall and just..a smile.

I've learned...

I dont have to be sad if some people dislike me.I have a family, true friends and 'kors' alike who stand by me through it all.so what more could i want?

I've learned...

The worst reason for a girl to dislike me is 'because i like the guy she likes'.
(Come on, i believe that if a guy likes a girl, he will like her with or without me there.Anyway, to me, true girlfriends are better than a boyfriend any day)

I've learned...

To say sorry when i did something wrong and to not when i know i'm being wrongly accused.

I've learned...

If i like a guy who doesnt like me, its just because we're not meant to be.I have plenty of time to wait for the right one.

I've learned...

To laugh whenever i can, and cry only whenever i have to.

I've learned...

A place is only as great as i make it.so why not make it great?

-bella-

MORE SUBANG RALLY PICS~~!!

2009-07-14T18:14:00.003+08:00

pics at subang rally. ( full story below x] )

2009-07-12T15:39:00.010+08:00

only din get lyd, jon n josh's pics....awww.... =[

the stage. P.U.S.H.!!

joyceee n me!

me n cryssie!

baby tonton xD (left)

da pope...

end altar call....

SUBANG RALLY 09!!!! P.U.S.H.!!! AWESOOOME~~~!!!!

2009-07-11T23:29:00.018+08:00

just came back from SUBANG RALLY 2009!!!!! this year's theme was P.ray U.ntil S.omething H.appens!! P.U.S.H.!! super HYPER right now!!!!!!!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH~~~!!!! IN CRYSTAL'S HOUSE!!!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!! O.O XDDDDDD

okokok.calm down *deep breaths.........* ok.now, i'll tell u the FULL story.

haha...i know wat u're thinking right now. 'oh no.gonna be 1 of her super long long-winded posts again...' xD so now i'll say 'you're right!! it is going to be!!!! bear with me!!!!!' XD

this day started like any other saturday.... (hahahaha....ok la.i dun sooo long-winded.oh wait.i am right now.WAKAKAKAKAKAKA..........)

ok la ok la.jus start from aftnoon.went to tuition at 2 til 515.then 530 reach church ady.until now haven bathe u know!! XD

anywaaayyyy.....abt 645, had dinner with crys, lyd, joyce, pope, joshua n jonathan.so funny.me n crys were wearing purple shirt, joyce n lyd wear hot pink (rally shirt), n jon n joshua wore white.only pope was wearing black n he was the 'leader' summore.so we were super synchronized!! xD shared a lam meee with crys.she ar, ask me dun take so much, later cant finish. -.- xD i belanja-ed 'everyone' (girls) drinks!! haha.but joyce belanja us girls FOOD.even more yeng! aah! steal my spotlight!! hahaha...jkjk! i absolutely detest being in the spotlight.alone-lyness is mah thang.as most ppl know.haha..

then went over to sunway college to attend the subang rally concert.it felt super awkward being in a college....like so 'small' lidat.lolx...we walked wat seemed like countless (5 floors) flights of stairs n arrived at the hall.

it was like, quite big.enough to fit almost 1000 ppl i'd think.we started off with a prayer.then school sing off where everyone jus started to sing their own school song.LOL.subang utama won. -.-

suddenly, everybody walk to the front! i was like 'huh???' but i just follow lor.actually, we're suppoed to go infront to sing n jump etc.etc..de.but i din know.haha.

the worship was AWESOME!!!!!! i got so super hyped up n jumped like craaazzie! that is, aft i managed to go infront instead of getting squished by 1 of pope's friends. -.- the feeling was FANTASTIC.cant say the same for pope however.emo person, man.to think that I used to be called emo. =.= had some interruptions tho.jhonston aka tonton kept calling cuz he couldnt find us.haha...

aft the worship, had pastor clement wong to preach to us.but i couldnt concentrate cuz had to go to da loo.. ><

cannot tahan dy.i dragged crys to teman me go find toilet.it was right behind outside the hall actually.aft going, they din allow us to go back in the way we went cuz its only for exits.lolx.aft going round n round n up n down n left n right.we got lost.when we ask for directions, everyone just say go upstairs go upstairs. =.= thankfully, we met with jon n josh n managed to all get smuggled back in thru the exit by a guy who just happened to be the dj! thx mr dj man!!! ^^

aft the word, ps ask those who r...to raise hand n let him pray for us.i just felt like something was pushing me to raise my hand.lolx.so i raise lor.then they ask us go infront. ><

aft that, they ask us to go to the back to get our details.lols..i met a friend there! her name's Hassheena.her mom's philipino n dad punjabi.totally cool.

aft giving the details, we exchanged numbers n got back to our seats.by then, almost finish dy.they were just praying for ppl at the alter.but i din know pun.or else i would've gone out.haha.me, crys n joyce did some cam-whoring.haha...

in the end, we prayed closing prayer.then just as we were abt to leave, they say sing one last fast song!! wwwoooootttt~~~~! this time, i was REALLY TOTALLY HYPER.i just absolutely lost control n jumped like mad person.summore aft the 'last song', we shouted 'we want more!!' n sang another song!! XDD jhon infront of me n crys beside me oso like insane dy!!!!! it.was.AWESOOOME!!! GOOD JOB JHON N CRYS!!!! LOVE U GUYS~~!!!!!! muaxxx! many thx to pope for inviting us!! n joyce, lyd, josh n jon for going!!!! haha. xDDD thx subang rally commitee!!! was a GREAT MARVELOUS rally!!!! *CHEEEEERS!!!*

finally........(crys here go kill me ady.its now 1240 n she's been waiting to blog sice like, 1130. XDD) we went back!!!!!! T.T sobbb~~~~~so sad~~~~~~~~byebye rally~~~ T.T waaaaaahh.......

then now sleepingover at crys's house! whee~~!!!!!!

ok.crys parents gonna be back soon.gtg! =P

A moment to remember

2009-07-06T19:14:00.004+08:00

The empty, desolate street.
The still, parked cars.
The beautiful trees swaying to the music of the earth.

Riding alone on my bicycle,
thousands of things are running through my mind.
Worries and troubles and depression.

Then suddenly,
nothing.
Feeling nothing,
but the warm evening sun shining on me,
the cool strong breeze blowing through my hair.

Listening to soothing music coming from a neighbour's house,
remembering bad memories that were locked in the basement of my mind.
Memories that haunted my every move.
Memories that kept me from trying.

I close my eyes and let the wind blow me away.
To a place full of magic and wonders,
where only happiness exists and sadness has never been heard of.
It's beautiful.Just beautiful.

A gust of wind comes.
It's blowing at a tree.
A tree covered with dead leaves.
Ugly dead leaves.
I know.It's my bad memories.
I feel it.
Like a heavy pressure on me.
Then all of them blow away with the wind.
Revealing a beautiful coat of new leaves underneath.
They will not haunt me again.
Not anymore.

I slowly open my eyes.
The breeze still blowing all around.
With tears in my eyes,
I take a deep breath.

This is definitely...
A moment to remember.

p.s. dear reader, please do NOT close your eyes and cycle like i did.i will NOT be held responsible for any accidents.thank you. xD

God's boxes, Your friendship

2009-07-03T18:07:00.002+08:00

I have in my hands two boxes,
Which God gave me to hold.
He said, 'Put all your sorrows in the black box,
And all your joys in the gold.'

I heeded His words, and in the two boxes,
Both my joys and sorrows I stored,
But though the gold became heavier each day,
The black was as light as before.

With curiosity, I opened the black,
I wanted to find out why,
And I saw, in the base of the box, a hole,
Which my sorrows had fallen out by.

I showed the hole to God, and mused,
'I wonder where my sorrows could be!'
He smiled a gentle smile and said,
'My child, they're all here with me..'

I asked God, why He gave me the boxes,
Why the gold and the black with the hole?
'My child, the gold is for you to count your blessings,
The black is for you to let go.'

We should consider all of our friends a blessing.
Send this to a friend today just to let them know you
are thinking of them and that they are a joy in your life.

A ball is a circle, no beginning, no end.
It keeps us together like our Circle of Friends.
But the treasure inside for you to see,
Is the treasure of friendship you've granted to me.

2009-06-29T19:03:00.005+08:00

23:23

the numbers i see almost every night.every night, before i sleep i will put my handphone on the floor if i'm going to sleep.unless i'm sms-ing with someone.

but no matter what happens, i will see those numbers.

let me explain. >>
lets say, i'm typing a msg.type type type..suddenly feel like just pressing the 'back' button.23:23.
or maybe, i'm half asleep.but suddenly wonder what time is it already.23:23.
how about, i'm chatting with someone.'how come still havent replied me?' look at the hp.23:23.
hmm.i'm sleeping.suddenly feel like wanna go to the loo.wat time already? look.23:23.
next,i'm watching tv.'when's this show gonna end? what time isit?' let me guess.23:23.

almost EVERY NIGHT this will happen.i dunno if this is a sign or something....maybe an answer to an exam question? a time when i have to do something in future?? i dunno.i just hope it aint something bad.but i'm not really caring....dumdeedum...
wat do u guys think? lolz.

kays.i've said what i came to say.I'LL BE BACK. xD tatas guys~!!

short story..wrote myself.touching to me when i re-read it.lol (repost)

2009-06-23T20:33:00.003+08:00

where am i? its so dark.is this nightime? trees are surrounding me at all sides.they're black and leafless.where am i??! i'm..lost.how did i get here???!

'help! is anyone here?? help me!! please...!!!'

~

i have to find the way out of here! all i can think of is running.i run and run and run.....
its so dark.its too silent to be a forest.all i can hear are my footsteps.

i dont see anything but the black trees.nothing.its so scary.i start to cry.but i keep running.'dont stop' i tell myself.i struggle through some branches.they scratch me all over.i dont care. 'run.just keep running.get out.' was all i could think.

finally,my legs could stand nomore.out of breath,i fall.

i open my eyes.was that a dream? no.i'm still here.
it should be morning by now.where's the sun? its still as dark as ever.i try to get up, but my legs wont budge.like they're paralyzed.i cant do it.

what's that? a bright light catches my eye.light! there's light! i starts to grow dim.
'no! dont go!!!' i push myself up.my legs wont move. 'get up!!!' i forced them up.they hurt.they feel more painful than anything i've ever felt before.tears start falling from my eyes.

run.run!! i cant.i can barely walk.the light moves.it goes further and further away.i feel the darkness coming over me. 'no,wait.wait for me..' RUN!! i start running.i dont care how much it hurts.i want to get out of here.the light is so far way it looks like a tiny star almost disappearing. i dont stop.'i wont.' i promise myself. 'i wont..'

after what seemed like days and days of endless running, i see the light.its not more than a mile away.i run like i've never ran before.
finally,i'm there.standing right in front of it.before i can say a word, its glows so bright till i cant open my eyes, and then vanishes. 'no!!!! COME BACK!!!!!!' i'm enveloped in darkness again.
its gone..gone.

i kneel down and start crying.i give up..i give up.

suddenly,something nudges my knee.i look up.its a mouse.tiny and harmless.then i notice, i'm not in the jungle anymore..i'm out! I'M OUT!!!

i breathe a sigh of relief...its over.
my energy is totally used up.i lay down and fall asleep.

~

its morning now.a dim light shines in the sky.its not the sun.i'm on a gloomy,cold stretch of bare land.the forest has disappeared.

in front of me lay a huge jungle of rose plants.rose plants that were almost 4 feet tall.the roses were a shade of black-red.big thorns stuck out from all the branches.
i stand there.wide-eyed staring at them,speechless.

'its not over.' no...

i sit down on the cold hard floor.planning to just lie down and die.
then sudddenly, a strong wind blows in.i'm freezing cold.where is this coming from?? i cant open my eyes.it didnt take me long to figure out,its a hurricane.

i have nowhere to go.it was either the wind, or the thorns.
i try to hide in a narrow pathway in the branches.

thorns scratch my whole body.my clothes are torn by them.blood is streaming through my wounds.i noticed the path gets wider as it goes on.even so,the narrow part is very long.i know i would be hurt badly if i go on.

but there is no option now.i pull myself through the branches.pushing away as much as i can with my hands.i yell in pain as the thorns poke into my arms. 'keep going.you're almost there.keep going...'

the path starts getting wider.then,less and less thorns could reach me.finally,i'm walking in the middle of the rose jungle.my wounds hurt like crazy.i tear off a part of my sleave and soak it in a puddle of water.i use it to wipe my wounds and bandage my right arm.

the sun is still nowhere to be seen.i just keep walking.glancing around once in a while to see if any horrible creature comes jumping at me.

after some hours,i see the end.the end of the jungle.my energy is failing me and i feel like i'm going to die of exhaution......

but its not over.i'm in more darkness.its just a dark and empty space.i have no place to run.no way to go.i would just be walking on and on into nothingness if i continued.

not knowing what to do anymore,i fall to the ground.i sob and sob endlessly.but right then,i remembered.

pray.try to pray.

'God..help me.please..'

~

i wake up to see myself in a field.green trees and flowers surrounding me.
i feel...safe again.i'm safe again.

YOUTH GATHERING

2009-06-16T18:13:00.005+08:00

hey....

okay.i saw joyce and lyd both posted about the youth gathering that's coming up in our church (GTS)..so i thought 'why not? the more the merrier right?' haha..

we're gonna have BBQ & Games.....

here are the details..

Date : 26 June 2009

Venue : Glad Tidings Sunway <9, Jln PJS 11/8 Bandar Sunway 46150 Subang Jaya> (right beside sunway pyramid actually xD)

Time : 7.00 - 10.30pm

Fee : RM10

Closing Date : 19 June '09

its mainly just barbeque, games and chatting.if you're interested, tell me before the closing date k! ^^ ciao~

read it and weep

2009-06-13T23:12:00.002+08:00

today, i am walking into the future and letting go of the past.

enough hurting myself.enough crying.enough thinking everything will be fine if i just cared abit more.enough.
i've had enough.of everything.

it's time to put a fake smile on my face and get on with life.get on with everything i'm supposed to do.everything i'm required to.stop caring if others approve or disapprove.stop trying to fit in when i obviously don't.
stop.just stop.
i just want everything to stop.

time to stop.stop thinking.stop pretending.pretending i dont care when i see the gang of friends, knowing i will never be a real part of it.pretending i'm perfecty fine with people just leaving me alone.pretending i don't feel left out of the loop.

stop.please.stop.

drum roll DAVID our camp game master!!

2009-06-13T18:59:00.004+08:00

hah!! finally found the pic!!! this is DAVID.in the pic, he was like 'aaaahhh!! quick!! so cold so cold!!!' after they 'finished' he was jumping everywhere cuz of the cold. xD

'dont take me!' *shy*

Church camp 2009!!

2009-06-09T15:30:00.022+08:00

Whew.just came back from camp on sunday...

Ps Jason Goh was awesome.his preaching really touched many people..

first day, went up Frasers Hill in the church van with joyce and all the PA things and instruments.lols..reached there about 12 something.checked in and carried our luggage to the apartment me, joyce, lydia, her sis, ps soocheng and yu lian shared..haha.it was the last block of the row on the highest floor (4th)! we were panting like crazy by the time we got up there! lols...

after lunch, we had like, 4 hours of free time before dinner cuz no games.just lepak-ed and watch the worship practice for the night session.lol..the boys spent most of their time playing futsal as expected..dinner was ok...not exactly my taste, but not bad.

the 1st session was good.actually all the sessions were great.mucho excelente! xD

at night, me n joyce talked for hours in the room before sleeping.haha..lotsa things to talk about mar...hahaha..the stupid mosquitos kept me awake so long that night!! also cuz i dunno why super scared.slept at 3am.then wake up at 3.45am thinking i got thru the whole night.so angry when i looked at the phone and see big big numbers 03:45 there! argh!

summor keep hearing footsteps at the balcony outside...so super scared..so go and sms rueben.haha..who knew,he also nvr sleep yet.lols...finally at 430am, i fell asleep.that guy ar....630am only sleep.. =.= amazing how a person can sleep so 'late'.lols...

the next day woke up, go for morning devotion, then breakfast.also okok.just eat vry little though.lol..later 2nd session, like i said.awesome.

and then once again, after lunch super alot of free time cuz again the games coordinator (david) still hasnt arrived..again watch the worship practice.then crys and lyd go hiking..while me n joyce n laiyee just lepak around and hang out at the dining area with tim.suddenly, hiking people come back dy! johnston came and sit with us but crys and lyd dunno go where liao.

then tim got bored or hungry or something cuz he took johnston, me, joyce and laiyee downhill to buy some AWESOME goreng pisang and fried sweet potato and lekor.we went and eat the food at the tennis court while watching the guys playing futsal.yes, again.the lekor with the sauce was ssoooo AWESOME!!! and the goreng pisang!!! haha.the sweet potato not as good cuz vry hard.tim say like eating cardboard. xD but still good la.hahahaa...

later went back to wash up, have dinner, 3rd session, worship practice again (this time i was IN the worship practice.haha).

then had an 'illegal youth gathering'. xD jhon and tim told all their funny stories about their missions trip and past camps..so so so super funny lar they all....apparently, they have many stories about rueben.hahaha...sooo miss it........

nighttime, talk with joyce in the room again and sleeeep......

what i'm really trying to get to here is the 3rd day.so bear with me awhile ok..lols.

that night was much better cuz we kept the balcony light on and i wasnt so scared.also, i covered my blanket to the very top and used my jacket to cover my ears.haha..

ok.now finally, THE 3RD DAY.

woke up with a headache and super emo.ate the least i've ever eaten for breakfast.then went for 4th session where i did the projecting for the worship time.once again, Ps Jason's preaching was magnificent.

we had our photo session right after that.everyone was wearing the camp t-shirt (which is lime green).but i, on the other hand, was wearing a white blouse cuz i didnt get the camp shirt cuz i registered late.we sang a birthday song for unc.Gu cuz, obviously, it was his birthday.we had deeelicious chocolate cake for lunch dessert.yummmm......

aft lunch and not so long free time, we finally had games!! we split into our groups.the game goes like, we have 2 mins to get to a station, then 8 mins to play the game.after the 8 mins/we play the game, the station master will give us a riddle.then we take another 2 mins to get to the next station, 8 mins to play the game, get the riddle, and...

the first game was, we split into smaller groups, hold hands,and put the hulla hoop through our hands as many rounds as possible til the 8 mins are up.

the second game, we have 18 peices of chewing gum.we have to chew it awhile, then (using gloves) make a tower as high as possible.ewww...haha.

in the third game, we had to pick up marbles in water using chopsticks then go back still holding it in the chopsticks.the kids have advantage.they can pick up, then hold it back with their hands.but becuz of miscommunication or something, everyone thought that the kids could just grab it out of the water using their hands.haha...

fourth game, there is a box filled with flour + water.its like some kind of batter.there are alot of marshmallows inside also.we have to one by one, go and pick up the marshmallows with our mouth.the batter was super bitter! disgusting ler... ><

fifth, we have to write what we see using strings attached to a marker without touching the marker.

last one, hard to explain.there are a few pails.one person will do sit ups in front of the pail while scopping up the water with a cup.then pass to another person who will pour the water into a water bottle.then keep going like that.

aft the games were over and results were given, everyone went out and the guys start throwing the leftover flour (from fourth game) all over david the game master.hahahahaha....he was so white he had to wash himself n his clothes out there.he was so cold!! XD

after showering was the dinner.ohhh the dinner.it was stemboat.super super AWWWWWESOOOMME!!!! i ate sooo much.....even more then tim (or so he says)! haha...everyone (especially jhon and jienyue) couldnt stop commenting about my eating.hahaha.....but seriously lar.it was fantastic.very fulfilling.cant say filling, but FULfilling.wahahaha...... XD

aft another superb session, us youth had a last-night-of-camp party.haha..ps chris said we could stay out til 1am.but ps soocheng said we (me n roomies) could stay til 3am.haha...joyce, david and me missed quite abit of it cuz we were watching vids of david's funny indian friend on his phone.haha.....by the time we went over to the others, it was almost 1am alrd..we chatted, ate junk food and had loads of F-U-N. ^^ but abt 1.10am, ps chris called to see where his roomies (reuben and qi ren) were.so they had to go back.but us others crept over to tim's apartment and continued our eating, drinking and being merry. xD we laughed our heads off that night.

by 3am, the older guys took us back to our apartments.i fell asleep in bed while listening to joyce talk to me.haha.sorry o joyce..i was really tired.heh.

the next day i woke up like a zombie.went through the breakfast and sessions quite awake.lols.. by 230pm, we went back in the van with some other NCA ppl......

byebye camp~~~ T.T

here are some pics...

david covered in flour xD

emo me =x

joyce trying not to laugh.haha..

guess who are these?? tell me if u can guess.haha....

2009-06-02T21:36:00.002+08:00

WHAT MASK DO YOU WEAR quiz

Your Result: Pain

Your mask is pain. For some reason or another you just can't seem to find a positive outlook on life. You get angry when people try to relate with how you feel, because you're convinced they won't understand. Deep down you know there should be a million reasons for people to want to get to know you, but you often find yourself closing yourself off from those around you. You have your select friends, but can't help but want something more. You find opening up difficult, but you do find your ways to let things out. You have your good days, but even through the good times, you feel like there is always going to be those feelings that don't sit right.

i cant help reading this again and again and again...its like this 'thing' got me spot on,BULLSEYE u know!!! and its just...ugh!!!!! i'm just so angry at it!!!!
how can this THING be so right... .><.
haih.i dont know whats wrong with myself.its crazy.sigh. ..><..

lalala~

2009-06-02T20:49:00.006+08:00

SAGITTARIUS (The Promiscuous One)
Spontaneous. High appeal. Rare to find. Great when found. Loves being in long relationships. So much love to give. Not one to mess with. Very pretty. Very romantic. Nice to everyone they meet. Their Love is one of a kind. Silly,fun and sweet (not always). Have own unique appeal. Most caring person you will ever meet! Not the kind of person you wanna mess with, you might end up crying.

got from email de...haha..not all true though.only the purple ones are true. xD

ok..soo..today went with crystal and joyce to sunway pyramid at like,1130.went to buy tickets first.see the whole place not alot of people, suddenly go cinema the line got so many people. =.= buy ady,go eat at A&W.i only ate 1 curly fries and nestea PEACH. (crys ask me add de.hahaha.) lols...aft that super hungry..

1230,went in to watch the movie ANGELS AND DEMONS.good thing got large popcorn and coke (share la) or else might starve liao! hahas.movie quite interesting..but the whole time i was freezing like crazy.thought gonna faint.lol.did u know i fainted once before cuz too cold in the cinema? >< lols.....

anyways, later went play in the games place.dunno wat place its called.the 1 that's super noisy n u have to buy tokens to play de.u know? hahas.fun! x]

aft that, jus walk around a while then see a guy ice skating..sooooo admire him la xD his skating i mean..waaaaaahhh.... O.O the skating ring only him 1 person.so many people watching him..pei fu pei fu *bows* haha....

watch till finish liao, just walk around everywhere til like 5 something.then went home ler.

k la.gtg gtg.crys waiting for me to finish writing.haha..bye~~

what mask do you wear? quiz

2009-06-01T15:28:00.001+08:00

Your Result: Pain

Your mask is pain. For some reason or another you just can't seem to find a positive outlook on life. You get angry when people try to relate with how you feel, because you're convinced they won't understand. Deep down you know there should be a million reasons for people to want to get to know you, but you often find yourself closing yourself off from those around you. You have your select friends, but can't help but want something more. You find opening up difficult, but you do find your ways to let things out. You have your good days, but even through the good times, you feel like there is always going to be those feelings that don't sit right.

all too true.wish it wasnt.but i cant change reality

the truth about me.

2009-06-01T14:25:00.002+08:00

I'm good at not caring.Pretending to not care at least.It's easy to put on my earphones and get lost in the song, pretending i'm not caring about everything that's happening around me.But you can never fully ignore the things that are going on around you.

Sometimes, i can control my mind until i really don't care.About anything and everything.But well, i'm not heartless.Controlling your heart isn't as easy as controlling your mind.How you feel is 10 times harder to change than how you think.

I wish i was heartless.Then i wouldn't get hurt by people.I wouldn't hate.I know that means i wouln't love either.But i don't want to hate.Even if it means i cant love too.

2009-05-30T13:43:00.001+08:00

i just couldnt help posting that post again..heh.

its just so...meaningful.so true. =/

=']

again

2009-05-30T13:38:00.003+08:00

You would think as it is so important, it would make the loudest noise in the whole world, or even have some sort of eardrum-bursting sound like the beating of a gong or the ringing of a big bell.But it is silent, and you almost wish there was a sound to distract you from the pain.

If there is really a noise, it's eternal.It screams..and no one can hear it but you.It screams so loud your ears sting and your head aches.It thrashes around like a great white shark getting caught in the sea.It roars like a mother bear who just lost her cub.That is what it looks like and that is what it sounds like.A thrashing, panicking, trapped great big beast, roaring like a prisoner to its own emotions.

But that's the thing about love.No one is untouchable.It's as wild as that.But when it actually breaks, its totally silent.

Now i know.It is time to stop walking with my head in the clouds.Hoping hopes that don't happen; dreaming dreams that don't come true.Instead, keep my head on the harder soil of ground level i should always have been rooted to.

There are no happily ever afters.There is no such thing as love at first sight.

2009-05-28T16:59:00.003+08:00

just a short post to say....

EXAMS ARE OVER~~~!!!!!!!!!! WOOOOOOOOOHOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!! SO HAPPIE!!!!!! HOLS ARE COMING!!!!!!!!!! SO HAPPIE!!!!!! CHURCH CAMP!!!!!!!!!! EVEN MORE HAPPIIIEEEE!!!!!!!!! WEEEEE~~~~~~!!!!!!! ^^

parents' day~~~

2009-05-17T17:08:00.002+08:00

HAPPIE PARENTS DAY DADDY N MUMMY~~~~!!!! ^^v

welp..today went to church at 930 instead of the usual 10 to practice for parents day presentation....wore my dance dress there cuz supposed to dance with crys at service time...

she doesnt have the dress so had to borrow frm ash..who said she'd give it to her aunt to bring cuzs he's not going..but then there was some kind of mix up and she forgot to give it to her aunt..so we had to cancel the dancing... >< i was super disappointed and angry and emo cuz i took like 4 hours to make the steps!!! argh!

so then...we were just standing there getting ready to sing when suddenly, jes just came up to us and said 'button ur shirt and dance like this'.lol.dun get it wrong..i was wearing 2 layers so she ask me to button outside de.lol..we were so surprised!!!

so we quickly went up and dance like that! xD but good thing was,me n crys were both wearing long black pants.and our top was both white too! haha...of course we felt sorta awkward.but it was a good awkward. X]

later, the kids had 2 presentations...tambourine dancing and dancing-and-singing..then the youth (including me) presented 2 songs..1 chinese, and 1 english 1 that 'the youth' (i think jhon and david..) composed...

after that, we gave our handmade rocks (nonono..not we make the rocks..we jus painted them n stick a house on top.haha) to our parents...i gave 1 to my mum, and the other 1 extra that i made to aunty peggy.. ^^

'kemudian' xD, just the normal sermon lor..quite good...then altar call, then end service.....

went to this coffeshop for lunch where we met jienyue's family...so just eat together..

now i'm back home n have to go bathe my doggie! bye~~

let me be myself

2009-05-17T16:56:00.002+08:00

am i bad the way i am?

i know i have flaws...but who doesnt?

i know i mess up.i know i mess up alot.but is that a good reason to hate me?

i know i'm very straightforward about my feelings..but is that not a good thing?

i know i'm not rich..but is that really such a big deal?

i know i'm not the most lovable person a friend can be..but i try dont i?

dont i....

camp here i come!!! =P ^^v

2009-05-12T16:37:00.002+08:00

i'm going to church camp!!!!!! wooo~~~!!!

cant believe i'm going!!! all thanks to pssc who let me register late! thanks! and my parents who finally allowed me to go! thankssss!! ^^

woohhooo!!

just want to let it all go...

2009-05-11T18:21:00.002+08:00

so super sad right now...

parents dont let me go to church camp...so sad....sob...

i'm so worried about my future i just dont know what to do....

everything's wrong..just wrong.

feel like dying...

God help.......please...... .><.

mother's day!!

2009-05-11T18:09:00.002+08:00

Happie belated mother's day mommy~~!!!!! ^^

Saturday family went to celebrate mother's day with aunt & family....was good...jus eat rice and dishes..expensive leh! >< haha..anyways, as usual, i ate 2 and a half plates of rice and 5 glasses of tea. 0.0 i know i know.i dont look like i can.but i did! xD after that so full til cant walk! xDD

then went to see kai ma's newborn baby at other aunt's house (which is this aunt's neighbor.haha.) ate cheesecake!! mmm....so super nice....other other aunt make de. xD then my aunt (again another 1. xD) said she's gonna give me the recipe! cuz my mom duwan make.so she ask me to make.haha.
kai ma couldnt finish her cheesecake so i quickly grabbed it! but in the end also got share with cousins la.lols.cant eat alot extra when my cousins are around.ahaha...

btw, if u got confused, its 4 aunts all together. xDD

stayed till about 12am..then went home lor.sunday couldnt wake up cuz slept so late.. =P hahas.but still got go church lar... =]

kays.that's all for now.see u guys around!

let it go

2009-05-05T16:38:00.003+08:00

When you drop a glass or plate to the ground, it makes a loud crashing sound..When a window shatters, a picture falls from the shelf, or a book drops from your hand, it all makes a noise.
But as for your heart, when it breaks, its completely silent.

You would think as it is so important, it would make the loudest noise in the whole world, or even have some sort of eardrum-bursting sound like the beating of a gong or the ringing of a big bell.
But it is silent, and you almost wish there was a sound to distract you from the pain.

If there is really a noise, it's eternal.It screams..and no one can hear it but you.It screams so loud your ears sting and your head aches.It thrashes around like a great white shark getting caught in the sea.It roars like a mother bear who just lost her cub.
That is what it looks like and that is what it sounds like.A thrashing, panicking, trapped great big beast, roaring like a prisoner to its own emotions.

But that's the thing about love.No one is untouchable.It's as wild as that.But when it actually breaks, its totally silent.

Now i know.It is time to stop walking with my head in the clouds.Hoping hopes that don't happen; dreaming dreams that don't come true.Instead, keep my head on the harder soil of ground level i should always have been rooted to.

There are no happily ever afters.There is no such thing as love at first sight.

life's worth living?

2009-05-04T15:11:00.004+08:00

life is like the sky.

sometimes its rainy,
sometimes its sunny.

in the morning its bright,
but at night its dark.

just remember..

the rainbow always appears after the storm..

we're fighting..and will always be fighting.

fighting to live right,
fighting to live well,
fighting to live.

stopping the tears that threaten to fall.
forcing away thoughts that threaten to drown us.
holding back memories that threaten to hurt us.
fighting.

it doesnt matter if we lose the battle.
it matters that we fight our best.

noone can take away the innocence...of childhood.我会永远怀念以前的我

2009-05-03T18:38:00.007+08:00

某年某月的某一天..

你和我在那里

傻笑的认识了.

从那天起,

你就变成我的开心果..

每当我开心时,

你都会在那儿.

和我分享..

让我更加的快乐..

每当我伤心哭泣时,

你都会在那儿.

让我在你肩膀哭..

帮我抹眼泪..

每当我生气时,

你都会在那儿.

当我的枕头..

给我打到满手黑青..

每当我寂寞时,

你都会在这里.

陪伴我..

和我玩乐..

遇见了你,

我的天空便得更亮丽..

~~

当我们要分开时...

我真是多么的伤心...

可是你告诉我

‘我会永远在你心里

你会永远在我心里

不要哭啊.

我们会再相见的..’

我是完完全全的相信他的话.

那些时刻..

会永远留在我心里头...

永远不会消失.

~~

但是..

我还在等呢.

等到我们下次相见...

希望..

会赶快到来...

有缘就会再见吧.

朋友..

skipped church...tsktsk

2009-05-03T18:26:00.003+08:00

haih.when is this gonna end....still sick..but dun worry,i'm not here to blog abt my sickly-ness..

yesterday went to ioi and parents bought me and bro each a new guitar!! with the stand and strap and bag and everything!! yays!!!! ^^v and the guy selling even gave me his own guitar pick..he said its lucky.ahaha....woo! soo happiee!! wheee~~

this morning went to MPH warehouse fair in pj...ya,i know i'm supposed to go to chrch..but wat to do? parents tired mar....bought 2 books by bestselling author Cecelia Ahern (remember Ps I Love You? heh.) If You Could See Me Now and Where Rainbows End..jus started reading if you could see me now..

erm....guess that's all...see ya next time! ciaoz!

getting worse..omg..

2009-04-30T20:40:00.001+08:00

haih.ytd was headache sorethroat and low fever.today headache, sorethroat,cough, flu and high fever.sigh....wats happening to me.... >< scared...

feel like gonna die..

2009-04-29T16:47:00.007+08:00

headache...omg.feel like whole head gonna burst..aaaaaah... *holding head with both hands*
cant speak...got very bad sorethroat also...pain until even the teeth pain leh..ooowwww...........cant even eat n swallow properly without feeling like i'm swallowing a rock..
fever too..
sob............ .><.

when i...

2009-04-28T17:25:00.005+08:00

look at my house, i think of my family.

see best friends, i think of anna.
-cuz we are! ^^

see a smile, i think of crystal.
-cuz she's always smiling =]

see a teddy bear, i think of joyce.
-cuz she's just like one.haha.

see penguins, i think of laiyee.
-cuz she loves them..

see a tanning salon, i think of lydia.
-cuz she's soo tanned....

see a cat, i think of kat vee.
-cuz of her name lor! lols..

see tall and thin, i think of debbie.
-cuz she's tall n thin la..

see my tambourine, i think of jessie.
-cuz she teach de ma..heh

see a pic of Beethoven, i think of xin wei.
-cuz she's good at playing the piano...oo..lol..

see my water bottle, i think of Johnny.
-cuz he give me wan lo..haha

see twins, i think of rueben looi.
-cuz..hard to explain....just cuz la.haha..

see a monkey, i think of Johnston.
-everyone knows why..ahaha.

see guitars, i think of reuben pak.
-cuz he's my guitar teacher la.lol

see my guitar, i think of my cous bro.
-cuz he give me wan..heehee

see a pro guitarist, i think of kevin.
-cuz he's pro guitarist lar..haha.

hear 'apologize' by one republic, i think of eugene.
-cuz he sent the song to me last time.hehe

see drums, i think of david, jonathan and jien yue.
-cuz they play in the church.haha.

see basketball, i think of jay1.
-cuz i remember he says he plays with his friends.lols..

see a group of teens hanging out, i think of my church youth.
-cuz we're a group of teens! go gts!! ^^

see/hear my christian cd songs, i think of stan.
-cuz he gave me the cd.. ^^

see someone emo, i think of my 'old' self.

see stars in the sky, i think of how beautiful the world can be... =]

真的好想, 好想~ ><

2009-04-26T17:10:00.005+08:00

好想回去以前的我.

好想把心里的伤都消除掉.

好想你别对我那么冷漠.

好想再活过新的生活.

好想我们的友情继续到永远.

好想看到你的微笑.

好想把你的信都delete掉.

好想忘了之前的事.

好想...

再重新开始.

thank you

2009-04-26T16:48:00.003+08:00

thanks....
for helping me get over you.

ya.
you made me get over you!

you know what you did...!

or maybe you dont.

either way,you're the one who made it dawn on me what a jerk you are.
sorry..but i cant lie.

anyway, THANK YOU.SO MUCH.

p.s. u probly dont even know i'm talking about you! xD @.@ lol.

2009-04-24T18:48:00.004+08:00

*bzzzbzzz* *bzzzbzzz*
Caller ID : Aaron
*bzzzbzzz*

me :
hey! watsup?
...hello??
...HELLO!!

him :
she broke my heart.i'll never smile again..

me :
what are you talking about?

him :
remember the girl i always talk about? the super cute,super cool,girl good friend of mine?

me :
oh...

him :
ya.that one...

me :
why are you talking to me about me? xD

him :
swt! i am not talking about you!!

me :
then who is it???

him :
cindy.remember??

me :
oh...the girl you've had a crush on since i dont know when..

him :
i do not have a crush on her!!!
...
sorry.its like an auto reaction when someone says i have a crush on someone.
ya.i have a crush on her.

...

me :
well?? what about her???!!!!

him :
...
you know what? forget it.i'm hanging up now.

me :
no no no dont!! i just dont get what you're saying!

him :
fine..
she has a boyfriend.

me :
uhh..........so?

him :
you arent listening!! i like her! she has a boyfriend! i'm heartbroken!! do i have to spell it out for you???!!

me :
well i'm sure it would've been easier if you did in the first place..

him :
ok thats it.you are obviously not interested.
i'll go talk to someone who at least pretends to care!!

me :
no i'm sorry i'm sorry! dont hang up!! pleeeeaase....
i'll be so attentive you wouldnt even know its me!!

him :
sigh..fine..
...
well?? whats your opinion?

me :
about what?

him :
argh!!!!! i can burst an artery talking to you!!!!! goodbye!

me :
dont go!! please please please...i'm sorry.....i'll listen! i promise!

him :
long sigh...ok.last chance.
cindy has a boyfriend.i'm heartbroken..i need comforting.

me :
well,think about it this way.
she's way too short for you.when u wanna hug or kiss her,you'll have to bend down so low your back will ache! xD

him :
haha.its not funny.be serious!!

me :
okok, you killjoy.there are plenty of girls in this world.

him :
plenty of girls??!

me :
yea.i'm sure she's not that good....

him :
not THAT GOOD???!!

me :
yeah! there're lots of better girls out there!

him :
BETTER GIRLS?????!!!!!

me :
YES!! can you stop replying with a question??! its annoying!

him :
annoying????!

me :
its my turn to hang up now.

him :
sorry sorry..i got abit overexcited...
but really.better than her???
sweet,kind,pretty,smart, AND has a SENSE OF HUMOR!
BETTER THAN THAT???!

me :
okay okay..dont get worked up.
how bout we talk this over ice cream? my treat.

him :
nah.i'm so not in the mood for it.

me :
a cup of..something?

him :
i think i prefer talking just as i am now.

me :
well,thats fine with me.
you dont have to change if you dont want to.
unless you're in your underwear.then you have to put some clothes on first.
and if your breath stinks,you have to brush your teeth and take some breathmints first.

him :
i dont mean my clothes or my oral hygiene!!! i mean i prefer talking through the phone!!

me :
oh.ok then.you leave me no choice.
I DARE YOU TO GO FOR ICE CREAM OR SOMETHING WITH ME.

him :
well..........ok.if its your treat.

me :
nope.now its your treat.

him:
but you just said...

me :
that was before i had to dare you to do it! =P

him :
...fine. >(

*TO BE CONTINUED* XD

right for me, bullseye.

2009-04-23T16:15:00.005+08:00

I was made the wrong way..
Won't you do me the right way?
Where you gonna be tonight?
'cause i won't stay too long..

Maybe you're the light for me.
When you talk to me it strikes me.
Won't somebody help me?
'cause i don't feel too strong..

Was it something that i said?
Was it something that i did?
Or the combination of both that did me end?

You know i'm hoping you sing along,
Though it's not your favorite song..
Don't wanna be there when there's nothing left to say...

You know that some of us spin again..
When you do, you need a friend.
Don't wanna be there when there's nothing left for me..
And i hate the thought of finally being erased..
Baby that's the best of me.

Everything's behind you.
But the hope still stands beside you.
Living in every moment..
Have i wasted all your time?

Was it something that i said?
Was it something that i did?
Or the combination of both that did me end?

You know i'm hoping you sing along,
Though it's not your favorite song..
Don't wanna be there when there's nothing left to say...

You know that some of us spin again..
When you do, you need a friend.
Don't wanna be there when there's nothing left for me...
And i hate the thought of finally being erased..
Baby that's the best of me.

You know i'm hoping you sing along..
Though it's not your favorite song...
Don't wanna be there when there's nothing left to say..

You know that some of us spin again.
When you do, you need a friend..
Don't wanna be there when there's nothing left for me..
And i hate the thought of finally being erased...
Baby that's the best of me.

NO MORE.I'M FREE.

2009-04-20T15:09:00.002+08:00

no.not for him.not anymore.for myself.

CANT BELIEVE IT!!!!!!! I AM SOOOO OVER YOU!!!!!!!!!! I MEAN IT!!!!WOOOOOOOOOOOOOT~~~~!!!!! XDD YEAH!!!!!!!

it hurts.it really does,so much.but i'm gonna let go..for you.

2009-04-19T21:12:00.003+08:00

people say, 'If you love someone, you'd be willing to let him/her go..no matter how much it hurts you...as long as it makes him/her happy..'

so..i'm gonna do it.for you.

yeow.........

2009-04-18T20:34:00.003+08:00

so pain my feet......just came back frm worship practice..couldnt remember the dance steps..do til so kelam kabut.... >< haihs.hope we do better tmr...

*my feet hurt like crazy..even more than words can say...my feet hurt like crazy..since 530 today...* xD

i wont give up!! no i wont!!!!!!

2009-04-18T14:36:00.004+08:00

i'm gonna reach for the sky and never look down!!

but have to add alot of oil first!
*glug glug glug*

YEAH! NOW I'M READY!!!!!
GO!!!!!
加油！！！
wooooooooot.....!!

我不会再为你掉眼泪...

2009-04-18T14:11:00.003+08:00

its too hard.....

why is it when i try to look at the bright side, i cant find it....? .><.

why is it i feel especially emo when i'm with happy people?

why is it the dark side of things always seem bigger than the bright side?

why is it just seeing someone sad can ruin my whole day??

why is it that it hurts so much when i look at you?

why is it that i let you break me apart like that??

what am i doing here...

my new leaf. ♥

2009-04-13T18:36:00.004+08:00

you know how EVERYONE says i'm ALWAYS EMO...?

well....i'm getting tired of it.

NO MAS!!! (you'll know what it means if you watched beverly hills chihuahua xD)

yeah! from now on,i'm gonna be super cool, super happie gurl! wooooot.........!!!!! ahahaha....

wanna know where this sudden decision came out from?

weell...
these days i've noticed how my emo-ness really influenced some of my friends and made them emo too.. >< i'm so sorry guys........
tried to cheer them up,but they were just becoming more and more like me.always seeing the negative side of everything and getting sad over little little stuffs..yea,thats me.
CORRECTION : that WAS me.

so, i cant stand it no more.that's why i've decided to be a happier person.a more positive person.

its gonna be hard, i'm sure..i'm so used to the emo face i've been wearing,its gonna be real difficult to change...but i know i can do it.
even though i'm facing somethings that are really really very saddening right now.....i just know i can.

Jia you, isabel ><

The Easter Story : He Is Alive!

2009-04-11T14:21:00.002+08:00

went to watch the play The Easter Story:He Is Alive! yesterday night in Putra Stadium..was so touching.. .><. the actors can sing soo well!!
got pulled to the front by my friend when altar call...lols..

anyways,all in all it was very good. =] whoever's looking at this post who hasnt seen it, YOU SHOULD GO!!

Putra Stadium,Bukit Jalil.nightly Friday,Saturday,Sunday.8pm.FREE ADMITTION! ^^

hehe.

2009-04-10T18:38:00.001+08:00

cut short hair liao lu.................heh..

going to see the play 'The Easter Story : He Is Alive' tonight at Putra Stadium,Bukit Jalil! with mah 2 good friends! haha..gonna be sooo fun! i hope.. X] lol..

真的要放弃了吗.....?

2009-04-07T20:38:00.002+08:00

好伤心...好想哭...但是哭有什么用? 哭了会解决我的问题吗?
答案是,不会.

不管我做什么,我的心上的伤口...是不会走的.

我的心,永远都会有这个疤痕..它永远都不会再恢复原来的完美.

永远都已经是一个被伤了的心.

现在超想哭.... ><

seeing stars...

2009-04-07T17:17:00.003+08:00

everytime i see the stars in my blog layout (right), i remember the stars i used to see in my home in penang..sighs...miss it so much even though it's been like 4+ yrs since i moved to kl...

its funny..in penang, i used to always call my house 'my home' and go home and say 'ahh....back at my home sweet home.'
but nowadays,its just 'yeah.that's my house.' or 'i'm back.'
sighs..home just dont feel like home no more..

miss the stars that used to shine so brightly for me.....

mom's bday~

2009-04-06T18:37:00.004+08:00

HAPPIE BIRTHDAY MUMMY~~!!!

HAVE A TOTALLY AWESOME YEAR AHEAD!

AND REMEMBER...I LOVE YOU! *MUAX*

dreams..

2009-04-06T18:22:00.002+08:00

let me ask you..
have you heard this quote before?

"a mans dreams are an index to his greatness" -Zadok Rabinwitz

when we're children,we were always encouraged to have big dreams for the future.to become whatever we want to be..
but somewhere along the road,many lose this ability to dream..

WHY? is it because we realize what life is like in the real world?
i dont think so.

i think it's because we're settling for second best.
we are either to scared of what others will think if we do what we love...or we arent willing to stand up to the criticism and see things through..

i doesnt have to be like that.you can achieve great things..if you let yourself.

for sure you'll hav to start small...but dont stop there.set a BIG goal.and never lose sight of it..

WHATEVER YOU DO,DONT PUT LIMITS ON YOUR SUCCESS.NEVER GIVE UP.
WHATEVER THE CASE,DONT SETTLE FOR SECOND BEST IN YOUR LIFE.

hey...if you shoot for the stars and all fails,at least you'll still land on the moon...

dream BIG

2009-04-06T15:07:00.006+08:00

When I was a little girl

I swore

that I would change the world when I grew up.

Nothing else would be enough

Back then it all seemed black and white

But these days I just cant seem to find the child in me

Who always believed

I see it everyday

We settled for safe

And lose ourselves along the way

But if u dont dream big whats the use in dreaming.

If u dont have faith theres nothing worth believing.

It takes one hope to make the stars worth reaching for.

So reach out, for something more

Took a well perfected plan

For me to finally understand

But its not me

Faith is something I can't see

I lose the reigns and let them go

I broke the chains of fear

That had their hold on me too long

When all I felt was wrong

Ive wiped my tears away

now its time for a change

No I cant waste another day

Coz if u dont dream big whats the use in dreaming.

If u dont have faith theres nothing worth believing.

It takes one hope to make the stars worth reaching for.

So close your eyes and tell me what you see

between what's real and make believe

here's the path we've all been searching for

So reach out, for something more

than you ever could imagine then move

don't wait for it to happen

life's too short for not taking chances

the stars are far as they seem

But if u dont dream big whats the use in dreaming.

If u dont have faith theres nothing worth believing.

It takes one hope to make the stars worth reaching for.

So reach out, for something more...

is second best all i ever will be?

2009-04-06T14:57:00.004+08:00

i dont wanna run away from the truth..but what else can i do...?

sob..guys are so mean....

people hate me... *cry*

...

*sniff* mm.mom's homecooked chicken soup.. *sniffles.wipes eyes*

*go downstairs*

*slurp*

mmm...delicious.

do you even know i'm talking about you...didnt think so.

2009-04-05T18:29:00.006+08:00

you make me so happy sometimes..
so why do i want you out of my life?

oh, yeah.

cuz you make me sad most of the time...

~~~~~~

sighs..these days dunno why keep crying 'for no reason'.. >< crazy me...so sad...

sob..

life's sad when you're around..its sadder when you're not.

2009-04-04T16:19:00.004+08:00

ytd went to church at 4pm to help jon shoot video for church camp promotion..there were 7 of us all together.4 guys 3 girls.

its so wierd.when i was there, i felt really 'out of the loop'..i dunno, its just like, i couldnt connect with them you know..even when they stood in a circle,i always seemed to be the one sort of,out of it.so sad...so i kept going out of the room.. x'[ (gonna cry ady..swt..)
usually,i like being alone..but this time, it was so...hurting.i talked only a few times. (actually,i dun remember talking to any1 except lyd.)

you might've guessed, i was emo the whole the time.but to be honest,there were other contributing factors to my emo-ness..

at abt 630,we went to bidara to eat dinner.didnt feel like eating at all..even though i was super hungry....but aft some persuation,i ate.mainly cuz i was scared i'd get gastric or something..
while we were eating, it started pouring..pssc came and picked us girls up.but the boys ran back in the rain..lol.

dunno why after dinner,i cheered up abit.maybe cuz i was abit more..noticed? =/
anyways,yeah.i cheered up abit.

aft the boys showered,we sang songs til prayer time.that really cheered me up.

by cell time,i was quite ok.had some emo moments,but still ok.cuz there was this smiley face there that time.haha.thx lai yee... =]

aft cell,we practiced the chinese song for parents day.that time i was abit hyper,cuz the song soo nice.lol.then,went home..

at night,had such a horrible nightmare..woke up crying.. >< sighs..

k la.gtg.bye....

baroooomm.....ZAP!

2009-03-30T20:05:00.004+08:00

wake up.

rain..........................stop.
rain rain rain storm!....................stop.

zzz.sleepy time.

rain rain rain rain.............................

these few days' weather really suits my mood.gloomy...sighss..
wish you were here...

live life

2009-03-30T15:00:00.001+08:00

life.appreciate it while you have it.you never know when you'll lose it.seriously.you never know.. ><

of course some people can say 'who cares? if i die, i'll just go to heaven! have the good 'life'!'
but still, if God wanted us to live just to die, he wouldn't have let us live in the first place.

so guys,

LIVE OUT LOUD! LIVE LIFE TO THE FULLEST! DO WHAT YOU HAVE NEVER DID BEFORE, BEFORE YOU CANT DO IT ANYMORE! jia you!!

smile

2009-03-28T14:01:00.007+08:00

Smiling is infectious.anyone can catch it like a flu.

when someone smiled at her today, she started smiling too.

she walked around the corner and a guy saw her grin.

when he smiled, she realized she passed it to him.

she thought about her smile and realized its worth.

a single smile, just like hers, could travel around the world.

so if you feel a smile coming, dont stop it.

smile and get the world infected! =]

ps. i'm smiling even though i feel like crying.

you say it best...

2009-03-27T18:16:00.003+08:00

sighs...cant stop sighing..

i dont think anyone in this world can 'speak right to my heart'.. =/

isnt it wierd..? how when this guy friend likes you, you just wanna be friends and you reject him.
you 2 still talk alot.still really good friends.he still likes you though.your relationship becomes closer than when you rejected him.

then all of a sudden, he goes 'away' and you 2 dont talk much anymore.he meets this girl.he totally falls for her and starts ignoring you (guys are like that.most anyway).

and even though you know you just like him as a good friend, you still feel hurt.

wierd huh..

sobs....

2009-03-26T21:37:00.002+08:00

today vry emo....very very very very E-M-O.sigh...feel like crying.

thank God i have such great friend(s) to cheer/try to cheer me up....

thanks guy(s)..i'm sure you know who you are... =]

even if i dont feel ALOT better, thanks.a real lot.. .><.

youth cell

2009-03-21T21:45:00.005+08:00

well, ytd went to youth cell...there were exactly 10 people who attended.cuz most of them were in rangers camp.

worship time, there were only 7 of us.i felt really....comfortable actually.usually, when there are like 20+ people, i tend to be really shy to..u know,close my eyes, or lift up my hands, or just be touched by Him...

but this time, i felt very at ease.and the songs were all so...umm...well, i was really touched by those songs a long time ago.it felt nice to just close my eyes, lift up my hands and let Him touch me.maybe even...cry? shh.....lols..

of course, i'm not saying that i like it that so few youth attended.but, i guess, i just cant help it that i feel better when less people are around you know.. =/

what happened..

2009-03-21T14:49:00.002+08:00

i cant stop thinking and wondering....what happened to you...why wont you tell me?

whats wrong?? is it something bad? is that why you never come? oh what the heck,is has to be something bad! i dont care what it is.anything that's stopping you from coming is DEFINITELY bad!!!

urgh.getting so hyped up....yikes..cant stop thinking about it!!! ><

sighs.just hope you're okay..God bless!

through it all...You're with me..

2009-03-20T19:35:00.005+08:00

Your mercy found me

Upon the broken road

And lifted me beyond my failing.

Into Your glory

My sin and shame dissolved

And now forever Yours I’ll stand.

In love never to end

To call You more than Lord,

Glorious friend.

So I throw my life upon all You are

‘Cause I know You gave it all for me

And when all else fades

My soul will dance with You

Where the love lasts forever. (x2)

And forever I will sing

Lord forever I will sing

Of how You gave Your life away

Just to save me,

Lord You saved me.

With You, where the love lasts forever.

girls are like apples on trees.

2009-03-20T18:42:00.004+08:00

The best ones are at the top of the trees.

Boys dont want to climb up to get the good ones because they're afraid of falling and getting hurt.
Instead,they just take the apples that have already fallen down from the tree,which arent half as good,but easy.

So the apples on the top think something is wrong with them.when in reality, they're sweet, nice and amazing.

They just have to wait for the right boy who's brave enough to climb to the top of the tree and pick them.because those are the boys who'll appreciate them most and treat them the best.

good luck gals.jia you o! =]

=]

2009-03-20T17:13:00.001+08:00

love, makes life sooooooo much more complicated, so much more hurtful, so much more sad,
and yet,soo much better.

oh the irony.

LIVE YOUR LIFE

2009-03-20T16:16:00.004+08:00

life.appreciate it while you have it.you never know when you'll lose it.

of course some people can say 'who cares? if i die, i'll just go to heaven! have the good 'life'!'
but still, if God wanted us to live just to die, he wouldn't have let us live in the first place.

so guys,

LIVE OUT LOUD! LIVE LIFE TO THE FULLEST! DO WHAT YOU HAVE NEVER DID BEFORE, BEFORE YOU CANT DO IT ANYMORE! GAMBATEH!! ^^

i say

2009-03-17T17:09:00.003+08:00

************

the heart see's things that are invisible for the eye.it speaks a language we dont understand.

~

LOVE is a canvas created by nature and embroidered by imagination.

~

do not forget who you are.just be yourself and you will shine like a star.

~

if you want something you never had, do something you never did.

~

time is like a bird on the wing.is comes and goes as it pleases.

~

gravity isnt responsible for people falling in love!

~

************

it's all about you ♥

i never believe them when they tell me i'm beautiful. so why do i believe you..

sometimes the nicest things u say to someone are those you didnt have to think through. that also goes for the meanest.

you.

lost and found

2 people

quote of the day

TO: JOYCE

FORM4

thank you!!

cry

Christmas partie!

winter solstice...

PMR results~

pure happiness

19th december~

the sweeter the memory, the more the hurt..

course dinner...

lost someone...

i know you said that you'd be here anyway...

it ends now.

the host

Tu Amor ~

quotable quotes

Flyday already???

best weekend in months

gimme my 6As! i said give it!! XD

new leaf..?

PMR O.O

its never too late

trying to find a better part of me..

i believe...

thanks for the memories

1.8.09!!

johnnykor's art (AWESOME)

in this moment now, capture it.remember it.(26.7.09)

a lesson well learnt

MORE SUBANG RALLY PICS~~!!

pics at subang rally. ( full story below x] )

SUBANG RALLY 09!!!! P.U.S.H.!!! AWESOOOME~~~!!!!

A moment to remember

God's boxes, Your friendship

short story..wrote myself.touching to me when i re-read it.lol (repost)

YOUTH GATHERING

read it and weep

*drum roll* DAVID our camp game master!!

Church camp 2009!!

lalala~

what mask do you wear? quiz

the truth about me.

again

parents' day~~~

let me be myself

camp here i come!!! =P ^^v

just want to let it all go...

mother's day!!

let it go

life's worth living?

noone can take away the innocence...of childhood.我会永远怀念以前的我

skipped church...tsktsk

getting worse..omg..

feel like gonna die..

when i...

真的好想, 好想~ ><

thank you

right for me, bullseye.

NO MORE.I'M FREE.

it hurts.it really does,so much.but i'm gonna let go..for you.

yeow.........

i wont give up!! no i wont!!!!!!

我不会再为你掉眼泪...

my new leaf. ♥

The Easter Story : He Is Alive!

hehe.

真的要放弃了吗.....?

seeing stars...

mom's bday~

dreams..

dream BIG

is second best all i ever will be?

drum roll DAVID our camp game master!!

i say